(This page is 25% post consumer material, 60% Brazilian rainforest, and 15% me talking out of my ass.)

In�any case... Welcome to my Homepage

� �� Disclaimer:

� � � � � � � �� The views and opinions expressed on this page are those of me, Stephen Marts. They do not reflect the opinions of the company, it's board of trustees, or it's stock holders. And if you don't like it, you can cram it... with walnuts!

� � � � ��Hey there teddy bear! Yeah so I owe Caoili for that phrase, I just think it's hilarious... well sort of... Anyway, welcome to my homepage, the name is a bit misleading, but it's cool. On this page I will have many things, which are yet to be decided upon, but so far I can give you my hate list, my exceptions page, and my explanation page.... and a�links page. Plus, at this point in time, I would like to say that I am talking out of my ass, I know nothing. This page is just a�stupid fucking teenager bitching about how much life sucks. So, if you like a page with all sorts of crazy crap on the walls, my page is for you. And Dave Kirley still sucks.... but the TX play "Shades" was alright.... YOU ROCK ANDY!!! And he does too! Plus, I want you to say hello to my hamster, Dr. Evil. And I�would like to say hello to Chris, Liz, and Liz's friend Joy... I guess... And of course Eric (you cute bastard!). Don't ask, it's just better that way. While I am at it, I'll say hello to Dan, Woosley... ugh, and Alex.

Here's all my stuff.... enjoy...

Updated !!!320!!!

My Hate List - Well... that is sort of a lie... it's a�link to a disclaimer... you know... just in case. And the fact is that this will offend you. If you are Texan, white, black, asian, part of a major corporation, indian, two dimensional, physically fit, ugly, better than me, an actor, David Kirley, David Glassmeyer, rich, poor, homosexual, straight, part of a�syndicated television show... and... the list goes on... So you may just want to skip this all together.

My List of Exceptions - This is the list to all the things on my hate list that have one * thingy next to them. There is nothing offensive about this page... except maybe the language... but that's not my problem.

My Page of Explanations - This is the list to all the things on my hate list that have two ** thingies next to them. There are some offensive things about this page, so if you decide to enter here... the consequences are your own fault, this will offend you... maybe... You've been warned, so it's not my problem.

Step Out of Hell - This is my commentary on drugs... If you�do drugs, you will be offended by this little number. So make sure to clear the smoke from your bong before you read it at your own discretion. Have fun... lousy good for nothing burn out.

What the Fuck?-�I have been debating with myself for a month or so whether or not to put this on my page. It has the same URL as my " I Told You So" thing, but I�got rid of that because �it sucked. And in short, this is just me bitching about how I haven't had a date in for-fucking-ever.... fuck...

I Believe -�This is a well thought out argument as to the non-existence of a god or gods. If you are in anyway attached to your religion, I suggest you not read this. It might�just offend you... so read�it at your own risk.

updated

The List- Ever heard anyone say," Alright buddy, you just made�the list."? Well, if you have heard me say it, you are on here. This doesn't mean I�hate you, it just means you have pissed me off one time or another.

Links to really nifty pages - This is just�self explanatory.

Conspiracy Theory - This is a link to my page of�government conspiracies... it's fun... trust me.

A Little Note to Nathan - If you want to see what made me write this, go to my guestbook... and sign it while you are there.

Karmageddon (my suffering silence) - This is the newest addition�to my page. I'm pissed off�right now, so�this�is very pessimistic.

Okay... Apparently I didn't make this clear enough. Anything and everything on this page is my opinion, and if you have a problem with that you can go fuck yourself. I'm tired of people who say shit to my fucking back, if you want to say something to me, be fucking serious. I can't stand sarcastic fucks. Oh... if you are going to sign my guestbook, don't make it a private message. Let everyone see. And just to make it really clear, if you don't like this page, it's fine with me, I'm as open minded as the next guy... or girl. So, if you sign my guestbook, no stupid shit. So... in not so many words, Wise, you are a bastard.

" Though empty vessels made most sound, not one wise word was said."

This page has been up and running since sometime in August of '97 but went sorely�un-updated�for months. Now,�it is new and improved as of January�of '98. And has�been offensive�for 5�months now.

This lovely page�was last updated on May 24,�1998,�and will most likely be updated�in�a week or so. Oh...�and one other thing, Ricky Mason is a fucking bastard...�and one�day Simon�won't be there.

As always, this page is under procrastination

Okay, this is my�little warrior dude,

sign my guestbook or he'll beat�you.